Consistency is a struggle. My therapist has been trying to convince me to start journaling for the last eight months. He mentions it often and will casually say, “you should try journaling,” “it might be helpful to keep track of how your feeling in a journal,” or “journaling is a good way to express yourself.” I typically respond with “okay, I’ll try” and never do it. He thinks journaling is a tool I should have in my toolbox to help me make sense of my thoughts and feelings or just do a brain dump since I have ADHD. But I’m not very good at sticking with new things. My school of thought on trying new things has typically been that I’ll be a complete failure, so why even try. Or I forget about it altogether.

Over the years, I’ve tried many new things like sewing, knitting, baking, blogging, therapy, and so on. Of all the new things I’ve tried, I’ve managed to do therapy consistently, so I know it’s possible. My therapist and I have been meeting once a week for two years. Even when I felt like garbage or didn’t feel up to meeting with him, I still did. It’s good progress. That may be why today feels different. It feels like a good day to jump feet-first into something new. I have worked hard to get here with my therapist’s help, so I should try journaling like he suggested.

That’s why I’m here today, journaling for the first time, albeit in a public space. I am trying to understand why I chose to start a WordPress blog. But it doesn’t really matter. All I know is that I’m doing this for myself. Not anyone else. If what I write about resonates with you, great. If not, that’s okay. Stick around. You might change your own mind.

I have no expectations for myself and this journal. The goal is to write here once a week. If I can do that, I’ll be over the freakin’ moon excited!

Until next time.